Archive for June, 2008


Adjustments and blessings

June 26, 2008

Things are moving swiftly now on the ‘ol Immigration paperwork waiting game. I was BLESSED with an out of the blue offer from my mom and my dad to cover my remaining costs. This isn’t a small chunk of change folks, and so I am still in awe and total gratitude that they are giving this to me. I am to consider it as a late wedding gift, which blows my sails further in the wind. The fact that my StepUnit is behind this and supportive of it makes me think global warming is having a good effect on some people?? Too odd. StepUnit has always been out “shopping” every time I’ve called my dad since September of 2006. Gee, I have great timing don’t I? Hmmmm.

StepUnit has had ‘adjustment’ problems with the news of my getting married and hasn’t spoken to me since. She made things really hard for my dad for quite a few months and he and I didn’t speak. He wasn’t ‘allowed’ to. She was putting him yet again in the position of deciding between her and his own kid. Needless to say I wasn’t thrilled and I had had enough so I told him the same thing over Christmas of 2006. I told him I wasn’t playing the ‘pretend’ games any longer now that Kel is in my life, and if they can’t accept that then it’s a damn shame. If there are family functions or what not, I would not be attending without Kelly, so If they couldn’t accept the two of us than, well, that was it. I played the ‘pretend’ game with them since 1990 when I first came out and they chose not to talk to me for months. Family events I would show up alone, and no one would ask if I was dating anyone because then god forbid I might actually tell them I was dating someone and it was a woman. Can’t ignore the elephant in the living room if someone starts talking about it right?

Well, no more. I told my dad I was his daughter, and I missed him and loved him. I told himi how much it hurt to again be ignored and ‘looked down upon’ if you will since announcing my engagement. I told him I never expected him to jump for joy over his daughter marrying another woman, but I did wish he’d jump for joy that I was finally happy, and that I was happy with Kelly. He agreed actually, but told me to just be patient.

We continued to ‘sneak’ phone calls to each other, and eventually I would just call his house. Ironically, as I said earlier, I always managed to phone when StepUnit “just left to go shopping.”

Christmas of 2007 brought tears to my eyes as I started to see a glimmer of hope. Christmas gifts arrived and there were even gifts with Kel’s name on them that StepUnit had sent. Whoa! I didn’t care what was in them, it could have been a box of kleenex and I still would have been touched at the fact she took the time just to acknowledge Kelly.

So now out of the blue my dad calls my mom to discuss splitting the cost for the remainder of my immigration fees so we can get this ball going and get me back to work. I about fell off my chair when my mom told me, as there was NO way in HELL my dad would be able to do this without StepUnit being aware of it, so she had to be on board with the idea. SUCH A TRIP! The angels must have been working on this woman as she’s been sleeping, because this is such a 180 from where she’s been! Dang. Maybe my dad would be allowed now to fly somewhere halfway and meet me and Kelly for the weekend and StepUnit wouldn’t stand in the way?? I’d love it. I haven’t seen my dad since over 3 years ago now. And the thing of it all is that HE hasn’t really ever had an issue with me, Kelly, my sexuality. I mean yes, initially there is the shock when your kid comes out and you have to adjust and what have you, but I truly believe that my dad would welcome Kel with open arms if it wasn’t for StepUnit. Christmas of 2006 he actually “met” Kel on the phone and that had a great conversation! Oh that StepUnit. Well, we shall see!

So yes, I have a hefty bit of money coming my way to send into Immigration. While Kels and I have been stuffing away and saving, something always comes up that warrants dipping into the kitty and we never seem to raise the amount we need. It’s tough with one income, two adults and two dogs. Kel’s worked her butt off and I am telling ya, it’s driving me nuts not working and not contributing to the household money pots. I told her the other night that now hopefully I’ll be able to help bring home the bacon because she’s been out chasing those pigs alone for far too long!

I had to get new immigration photos taken this week as the ones I had were no longer valid as they are older than 6 months. Oh my god I look like a convict! I had my chest x-ray a few days ago, and this Saturday I go in for my Physical. Yikes! The doctor I am going to has a heavy Scottish accent, and yet the image that gets conjured up in my mind of what she looks like is Helga. I’m telling you, if she walks in and has horns on her head I’m running straight out of there and back to the states!! I am NOT looking forward to this exam, I will just say that. I have been poked, prodded, jolted, looked at, flipped over, felt and what have you many times in my life that the idea of going to the doctor and spreading my legs and all that really is NOT a big deal to me. But I’m telling you, for some reason, I have the jeebies about this appointment on Saturday. I am a wee bit nervous and truthfully I really don’t know why.

So all is going well. And yes, time heals…..or at least changes. It will be interesting to see if StepUnit is out shopping again when I call papa again at home. I talked to him today but phoned him instead at his office. I’m not holding my breath.

And yet again I am reminded of how damn lucky I am, and blessed. I was adopted at a young two weeks of age, and ended up with a man and woman that despite their inability to stay together they still show me how much they love me and are helping me out even though I didn’t ask. I am blessed.


Peacocks, cocks and dragons

June 23, 2008

Saturday started off with me cracking my eyes open at 5:30 from my not so comfy resting place on the floor of my in-laws family room.  Due to our need to be up and at-em so early Kelly, our good friend Jen and I opted to go over Friday night to Kels parents so that we could all leave from one place.  I wasn’t able to sleep, so I stayed up in front of the idiot box on the love seat.  When I finally was dreary eyed I went to the bedroom to find Kels passed out soundly, but laying diagonally on the bed.  She was joined with the big cat Jaggers, so I didn’t feel that I should disturb them by crawling in, waking them and demanding that they roll over.  I returned to the love seat.

The love seat just wasn’t enough space for me to curl up on with of course ensuring that Ipo was comfortable as well.  I woke up at about 3 am and just rolled off and nestled into the carpet.  Not exactly a restful sleep!

We all got ourselves mustered together, loaded the cars when our 5th companion arrived and we hit the road for Mitchell around 6:45, heading directly for Tim Horton’s to get our veins pumped with java juice.

We arrived on time at Mitchell and even got good parking spots right near where our team would be setting up for the races.  Dragonboat races!  WOOT WOOT!  It’s such an awesome sport, and this team is great because it’s all about the sport and being together, rather than just the races and winning them.  The team has a wide range of ages too which is awesome.  Needless to say, the young and feisty little 19 year olds kicked our asses, but hey we had more fun!

So todays entry is full of pictures.  For those of you who don’t have a clue what dragon boating is, it’s a sport and Chinese tradition that goes back over 2,400 years.  You have 20 paddlers, one drummer and a steerer all in a very low and narrow boat that is adorned with a dragon head at the front and tail at the rear.  (makes sense, eh?)  The drummer sits at the front of the boat and is considered the heartbeat of the crew; he/she sets the pace and tempo for the paddlers.  The steerer stands in the back and works with the drummer in calling the pace, and directs the boat, making best use of the winds to speed up the pace.  It’s awesome to watch!

Alas, right now I only watch.  Once I’m able to work we’ll be able to afford the costs for me to be a part of the team, but for now I am the geeky and weird, not to mention loud, supporter.  I do have an official job now which is the holder of the mallet.  Heh, heh, ok so it’s a made up title, but I do hang on to the thing until the heats start and I pass it off to the drummer.  Saturday that title was almost stripped from me, as I didn’t get my ass back to the docking area when our team was up to race.  I was still sitting over in the beer gardens and lost track of time.  BAD SHIPPIE!!  Kel, who was drumming that race, had to resort to using a big stick instead of the mallet.  Sigh.  We lost that heat too, so I guess it was my fault??

Anyhoo.  There is a little zoo in this park that we raced at, and I got a few pic’s I thought I’d share.  I even got to pet a cock!  And feed a baby reindeer!!  So here are the photos for today:

Yep, that’s me with three layers of clothes looking fat. (it was rainy and freezing in the morning)  But isn’t that little baby reindeer just the cutest!!  I so wanted to take him home with me!!

And here on the left is an amazing peacock on his perch.  I tried to go back and find him walking about to see if he’d spread his wings, but he stayed up on the perch all day.  And DAYUM!!  Those little guys are LOUD!!  Holy mother!  I need one of those as my alarm clock.  I’d never over sleep again!

And over here to the right is my friend Mr. Cocko.  Aren’t the colours of his feathers amazing?  He is just too dang cute!  He looks so studdly, as if he’s asking me to next time gain permission from him prior to shooting off a picture.

Here is the back side of Mr. Peacock who stayed on his perch all day.  The lighting wasn’t the greatest, but you do get a general idea of the amazing feathers he has.

And if you’ve never seen a peacock before and think that’s impressive, wait ’til you get a load of THIS pretty gal!  (Ok, I assume it’s a girl, just because she’s so purty!)

YES!!  A WHITE peacock!!  Stunning!!  I didn’t even know there was such a thing as white peacocks, but there she was!  She liked to pose I think.  I think she secretly wishes she was on the front cover of Cosmopeacock.

This next picture is just a tree.  Well, not just a tree, an amazing tree!  The photo doesn’t really do it justice, but it branches out in so many wild directions.  I stumbled upon this after trudging through tall grasses in my attempt to find another good place to take pictures of the races.  I could see myself hanging out on this tree for hours just watching my surroundings and writing in my journal.

And now on to a few of the race pictures.  I only had my little point and shoot as my good equipment is too expensive to use right now.  I’m old school and still prefer to use a manual camera rather than a digital.  But with film prices the way they are right now, that little hobby has to take a back seat for a spell.  Unfortunately my camera’s batteries kept dieing on me, so I wasn’t able to get many shots, but here’s a few so you get the idea.

Kels was the drummer in this heat and you can almost make her out at the front of the boat with the white cap and blue life vest.  They’d just finished a heat and were preparing to dock when this was taken.

Here’s a shot of the team just as they were nearing the finish line which was past the water fountain.  That water fountain is installed and hooked up every year just for this race.  The reason you don’t see another boat in the picture is sadly we got our butts kicked in this heat and came in a good 8 seconds behind the other team.  But hey, it makes for a nice picture anyway!

Here’s a closer shot as two teams finished one heat.  Most people are gasping for air and so happy it’s done if only for the moment!

So that’s it for pictures, and gives you an idea of my Saturday.  While I didn’t race, I was beat by the time we got home around 5 PM.  Being in the hot sun, not having much sleep, and the driving got me a tad bushed.  It was an exciting day and while our team came in 10th place, we had a blast and everyone was in great spirits.  I looked like a red lobster when we got home.  Quite the sunburn I had on my face and shoulders.  EEKS.  I wasn’t paying attention was I?

Oh.  One last thing that I have to bring up.  This place DID have a bath house that had a women’s restroom with two stalls.  Due to the amount of people present, they also brought in I think 30 Port-a-potty’s.  Now, I just have to say that I am by no means a super knowledgeable person when it comes to these portable toilet coffins.  However.  WHEN did they start putting mirrors in them?!  Cripes!  I scared the crap out of myself (sorry) when I stood up to pull up my pants and there on the door two inches from my face is a bloody mirror!!  WHY do I need to see myself when I’m pulling up my pants and tucking in my shirt??  I am not that vain!  I mean really now, if I was that vain, would I be using a portable toilet?


Behind and Sandy warning

June 20, 2008

Ack!!  I am soooooooo incredibly behind in reading blogs!  For cripes sake, I just can’t get myself caught up.  I think my google reader says there are 73 entries right now that I haven’t read yet.  Eek!!  I am trying to get caught up and have missed peeking in on a lot your lives!

I need to update something on that old Sandy of mine and the Flying DNA that I wrote about last.  I feel I must cite a ‘warning’ to any of you who may get the guts up to try and sand your own feet, or someone else feet!  Make SURE you are upwind when doing your feet, and most definitely if you are indeed doing someone else’s.  You really should consider wearing one of those white dust masks!

Kel mentioned her mom had really bad feet too.  Sooooo we decide to go over to her place and surprise her!!  We had dinner, and then I set up ‘the salon’ in the garage, had her come out and sit, close her eyes and trust me as I disrobed her feet and started up a power tool. Ha!  She loved it though.  Unfortunately all that skin dust went straight into my shnozzer!  I think I’m still sneezing from it.

I had to go to Rona yesterday and get some wood cut so that I can properly install the a/c units.  I gave up on trying to saw the damn wood myself as I was going at an angle and was almost frustrated enough to throw the damn wood and the saw off the balcony.  My luck I’d make contact with some poor soul and end up in prison for manslaughter or something.  So, while the sweet and adorable boy was cutting my wood, I wandered myself over to the screen repair area and finally picked up what I needed to fix ours.  No more evidence of Kel’s run thru the screen!  And what a great surprise for her when she came home.  Not only did I fix the screen but I took all FOUR of the freaking patio doors off the tracks and washed them-both sides.  LORDY those things are heavy and NOT easy to re-install!  But hey….they are purty now!

Not ten minutes after Kel’s came home we were sitting on the balcony….and little Ipo, bless her heart, tried to run through the screen door!  I don’t know what it is with this damn screen door, but now 50% of the being who live here have tried to bust it’s barriers.  Ipo was a wee bit stunned, but eventually made it to the balcony unscathed.  She’s done this before, in fact a few times she’s tried to walk thru the glass doors down stairs.  I don’t get it.  She’s got eyesight like a HAWK normally.  Must only be far-sighted I guess.  Hmmmm.  I know they make “Doggles”- those sunglasses made for dogs.  I wonder if they make prescription Doggles??  I could get her some diamond studded princess glasses to go with her tiara!  She’d look so damn cute!!

Tomorrow I’m going to go swim laps TWICE if the weather cooperates.  That pool of ours is an awesome length for doing laps and I so need the exercise.

Kel’s got a dragon boating race on Saturday which should be fun.  First one of the year, and a lot of newbies on the team so it should be interesting!  Hopefully next we’ll be able to afford us both to be on the team, cuz I get so dang jealous when I go to see her race.  It is an awesome sport!  I paddled a bit last year when they were practicing pool side and was told by one of the elders of the team that I have an incredible stroke and would be a great powerhouse for the boat.  Ugh.  That makes me want to do it even more!  But alas, I must wait and be patient.  Strange Good things come to those who wait!!

Ok.  I have to get caught up on everyone’s blogs.  I didn’t even do my pogo badges last week….for SHAME!


Flying DNA

June 17, 2008

I have horrifically dry feet. I so hate them. You know that feeling of moving your feet under the sheets, feeling the silky soft cotton dance across your soles and toes? Not me. I move my feet and the little fibres of cotton snag on the dry callouses that plague my walking devices and stop and feeling of pleasure immediately.

I walk across the carpet at times and those dry hunks of sandpaper skinned feet. It feels so utterly gross! And now that it’s summertime it only gets worse as I like my feet to breathe and feel free in my less than confining flip-flops. At least I’ve been told wearing these types of shoes makes callouses and dry, thick, cracking skin multiply like bunnies at an orgy.

Some have suggested a pedicure would help. Eeks. I’ve heard horror stories from people who have gone to these salons with their recycled, cootie ladened soaking water and butcher Estheticians. No thank you. Kel swears her foot problems never were a problem until after she went and had a butcher job on her feet nice and relaxing pedicure.

Besides that, have you seen what they charge for those things? Pffft. I’ll pass thank you. I will take my own clean soapy water and soak my hoofs, use my own pumice stone and grunt while I scrape away the aliens attached to my feet. No it isn’t always easy but I manage! And hey, if I want my toenails to have colour than I can do that myself too. Who cares if the polish lands not only on my toenails but the skin around those nails too? It just makes them that much more colourful and purty, right? I can do all that and save myself a few buckaroonies.

Alas. The pumice stone doesn’t work anymore. I try to do it while in the shower and I get so damn frustrated. I nearly work up a sweat rubbing that thing back and forth, back and forth. Not to mention there have been a few times I’ve lost my balance and nearly ended up on my fat ass with my feet over my head.

So I have given up. I haven’t touched those tootsies in months. Kels knows to keep herself away from my feet at night and I try my darndest to just let them hang off of my side of the bed, lest I find her in the morning with gashes on her legs and blood gushing in the bed sheets.

HOWEVER. Any of you who may share my plight, stay tuned. Yet another household item has been found to EASILY rid your far from attractive walking bricks! It is easy…..relaxing….and you won’t work up a sweat! Some of you may be thinking I’m going to say use Preparation H on your feet due to my previous entry. NOT! Seriously folks, don’t be so silly! Preparation H is only good for eye wrinkles, mosquito bites, supposedly acne, and of course the ever so loved hemmie. No, it’s something different my dear ones. You too can have your very own personal Esthetician. You can name it, (I call mine Sandy) and put her away in the closet when you’re done with it. And I don’t have to pay my Sandy either! Here is a picture of Sandy, and you too can have her!

Yes indeed! I was working on piece of artwork that involved wood cutting a piece of plywood for the a/c mount, and wondered if I had a different tool to ease my efforts. I stumbled upon this hot little beauty of mine and went AHA! I looked above my head and even saw that little light bulb turn on when this revelation came to me. Now, the nasty mean foot people have little hand-held sanders right? I know some people who go to Podiatrists and have their hard to cut toenails sanded down. So why couldn’t I use this? Huh? Why not? Well guess what folks? It was awesome!

I took it out on the balcony, sat in me chair, gave a Kels a glance through the door saying ‘trust me’ with my eyes, and fired that baby up! Now, it is a hand-held size so it was very light and easy to use. And oh my god, it looked like snow flurries had hit our side of the building! All that thick, dry and hard dead skin just started wafting away in teeny tiny little dust particles. It was a snow storm of my DNA on our balcony! Quite the show. I hope there isn’t a crime committed any time soon around me, because the wind carried bits of my DNA all over the place today!

And guess who sat in my chair before it even had a chance to cool off but Kels herself. She was so impressed with the fact that she could actually touch my feet now without cringing or drawing blood that she had to try it for herself. I made a dash for the lotion while she sanded hers down, and my feet just drank that stuff up! Usually given how dry they were the lotion would just sit there with no chance in hell of being soaked into the skin. Now? I put two big helpings of that creamy, quenching juice of the gods on each foot!!

Life is good. I want to walk barefoot somewhere to show off my new feets! I want to jump in the sheets and run my feet over all parts of the bed. Oh it’s the small things in life eh? Go get yourself a little hand-held sander and give yourself a relaxing pedicure! You’ll LOVE it! And if you have those sanding projects laying around just waiting to be tackled you’ll have the perfect tool for that too!


In the bum and out of the bum?

June 14, 2008

30,000+ motorcycles arrived today in Port Dover for the Friday the 13th ride. Incredible. Bikers from as far as California arrived for this attempt at breaking the Guinness World Record of 10,000+/-. I’d say they surpassed that record by just a few eh? Not sure how it started, but each and every Friday the 13th is known and “motorcycle to Port Dover.” You see motorcycles everywhere. Wish I had one to get on and cruise with the wind slapping against my cheeks. I soooo miss my bike.

Been awhile since I updated. I have to say that I learned an incredible little trick this week however. Earlier in the week Kels and I took the poochies out for their before bedtime duties, and I got eaten alive! Holy crap. I’m thinking the mosquitoes here haven’t tasted American blood because Kels got one bite, and my legs were covered with I think 34 bites. My arms had a few knarly ones, as did my chest, and I got one massive one on my ear that made me look like a lopsided Dumbo for three days. Not fair!

Needless to say I was in agony with the itching when we got back up to the apartment. Kels being the wonderful sweetheart that she is was pulling everything out of her hat of tricks to alleviate my discomfort. We tried vinegar- all that did was stink me up and repel the dogs from me. Then she made a baking soda paste. All that did was dry up and flake off everywhere I walked in the apartment. I again jumped in the tub and washed all that crap off of me and scrubbed as HARD as I could over every area that itched like a ‘Mo-Fo’.

She was ready to head out to the 24-hour drug store for the good stuff when she got a wise idea in her noggin. You know that lovely crap that you shoot up yer bum hole when it gets attacked by a hemorhoid?? Yes folks, I’m speaking of the lovely stand-by that every household should have- Preparation H.

“Honey? What about this stuff? It relieves swelling and itching!”

Well, if you can use it IN your bum, you should be able to use it on the outside of your body eh? So what the heck! We forged ahead and Kels got back on her knees to apply roid cream to the bites on the back side of my legs. (Isn’t she just a sweetie?)

And I must say. Within about 5 minutes….total relief!! No itching! I have a tendency to scratch myself raw in my sleep, so it was important to get me de-flamed if you will. (Ok, now some you may take that scratch-myself-raw comment to a direction it was not intended to go….get back out of the gutter now!)

To all my friends out there in cyberland I have one important thing to remind you. Make SURE you have that great smelling Roid Cream on hand at all times! Regardless if you get hemmies or not, if you are in the land of those nasty skeeters, this stuff is MUST have! I will suggest also that you invest in the CREAM rather than the gel formulation. The cream doesn’t not have near the level of stench of liver cod oil that the gel has.

So that is it for my words of wisdom today. Check your medicine cabinets people and stock up on the roid cream!


Broken LP

June 8, 2008


I feel as though I’m being cheated, and cheated big time.  Our dream life is supposed to be an escape in a sense.  A place our lil ol’ spirits go while our bodies are resting to have fun and frolic and experience new things.

My dream life is stuck.  It’s warped.  It’s as if my dream life is an old LP that has a scratch on it and so the stylus keeps skipping in the same spot over and over again.  I am feeling cheated.  I want to pick up that stylus and move it to the next song where there are no scratches to make it skip.

I find myself more and more often waking and reflecting back on dreams I’ve already had and trying to peck away at each detail I can remember to find the subtle difference so that I don’t feel completely cheated.  It’s not fair!  This has been going on for months and months now.

Seems as if so many of my dreams involve moving, and always have two people that I used to share a house with a few years ago as key players.  Last night I had the recurring ‘house’ in my dream.  It’s a house I’ve never seen yet architectually I must say it is incredible.   Well, until you figure in the wee detail that one entire side of the house has no wall and instead opens up to a hair salon and hallway of a strip mall, but who needs full privacy eh?  And the house I swear is like an over sized tree house, yet I never seem to be able to completely verify this in my dream.

I’m being cheated I tell you!  I don’t even care for the two old friends any longer that reappear in these ‘moving’ dreams; ugh, I’m always moving.  I have moved way too many times in my life.  I certainly don’t care to be having that kind of stress in my waking hours.

I long for the dreams again where I’m flying and seeing all of natures wonders again.  Or living under water.  Or hells bells, even having wild crazy sex.  I don’t care!  I just don’t want to be spending any more time in this house I’ve never seen or packing boxes with two people I’ve long ago said my goodbyes to.  Give me back the psychedelic colors and playful innocence of flying thru time!!


Stinky sweaty mama

June 7, 2008

I’m hot.

I’m sitting here just breathing and I’m sweaty.

I probably smell.

I am sure I look hideous and skanky.

The temps projected for the weekend are to be in the 90’s but with the humidity it will supposedly feel like 105-110. Pffft.

We don’t have a/c yet in our 12 floor apartment. We will melt.

The pool is not yet filled and just sits there taunting us with its half filled status.

Thank god we face north and don’t get the beasty direct heat of the sun. (yes, I insisted on north facing digs)

My legs look like a flippin feeding ground for mosquitoes from our bbq last night.  Or perhaps I just have a raging case of chicken pox.

We’re going to head over to the in-laws tonight to steal use of their central air for a respite. So they don’t feel like we are using them only for their a/c we are going to gussy up MIL’s hair for their 43’rd anniversary shing ding tonight. (MIL had major hand surgery recently and can’t do anything with the one hand much less primp herself for a night out on the town.)

We will also say we are in dire need of painting our toenails and the polish just won’t dry with the humid and hot condition of our living quarters.

So no. We aren’t just going over there to steal their a/c for the sake of being cool.

Ha. Yes we are!

Ugh. I’m too hot to post anything else today. I hope you are all finding yourself well and in a cool surrounding.

I’m off to watch Hillary’s concession speech. Should be interesting.